All across the country, businesses and schools shut their doors (or in many cases, simply don’t bother to open them yet after their summer hiatus), and people crowd streets, patios, decks, and yards as they take a day out of their busy new fall schedules to celebrate one of our nations most laid back and relaxing federal holidays. On the first Monday of every September, beaches are crowded, parades are thrown, and mail ceases to move, as everyone honors their hard work by taking the day off. Everyone, that is, but the hardworking students, faculty, and staff at Eckerd College.
That’s right, while our families and friends are off enjoying themselves at backyard barbeques we’re stuck in small classrooms, pretending to be interested as our fellow students share such vital information as where they’re from and why they’re taking the class.
Though actually, perhaps we at Eckerd don’t have it so bad. Sure, we’re forced to wake up early on Labor Day to attend our first classes, but a certain amount of pressure and stress is alleviated by having an excuse to avoid those day time picnics. Take, for example, this scene from you typical neighborhood block party:
(Lights up on a picnic table, laid out buffet style with a large assortment of napkins, plates full of rolls and meat patties, and salads of every shape and size. A woman stands at it, fixing a sandwich. Another enters, carrying a Tupperware (tm) container)
Woman 1: Hi!
Woman 2: Hello.
Woman 1: Nice weather we’re having.
Woman 2: I brought potato salad (Opens the Tupperware (tm))
Woman 1: Are those green peppers?
Woman 2: Why, yes! They really add a certain zest to the flavor, don’t you think?
Woman 1: I hate green peppers.
(Pause)
Woman 2: Could you pass a roll?
Woman 1: So how’re the kids? Have you got Mary potty-trained yet?
Woman 2: BARRY, our only child, is 17. He’s thinking of joining the Navy. But you’d have known that if you’d bothered to go to any Neighborhood watch meetings....
Woman 1: Oh look! A jello mold shaped like the Leaning Tower of Pisa! (Beats a hasty retreat)
So perhaps we’re really better off in class on Labor Day. At least there we’re allowed to not quite be aware of what’s going on. It certainly beats those uncomfortable moments.
Unless the jello mold has mini-marshmallows. Those are the best.
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